Sparty Hard for the holiday

Sooo this post is a little late, but we're all playing a bit of catch-up now aren't we?! yeah... thought so

St. Patty's day 2011 was a glorious occasion for gingers to pretend they're normal people, 10am shots, sorority girls to all dress identical (Editors Note: Aparently, Sorority girls do not require occasions to all dress alike, it is a daily occurence.), skipping classes, and getting completely white-girl wasted.

Next holiday on the calander: 4/20

Stock up spartans!!!

It's Spring Time!! Is love in the air?!

Uhh... doubt it, it is most likely:
the obnoxious shrill voices of drunk skanks awakened from hibernation
two drunk dudes yelling "GO GEREN" "GO WHITE" back and forth at eachother
the smell coming from whatever is in the Red Cedar
...and a mysterious eery tune coming from within the beaumont tower.

At night, when the moon is aligned just so, xylophone (or some other chromaticly scaled percussion instument) can be heard drifting through the ganja scented air of MSU.  There is only ONE explanation for this!.....

...There MUST be vampires living in the Beaumont Tower.

Luckily for us, these aren't the sparkly, angsty vampires like from Twilight, these are most certainly the dirty, raw, sexy vampires like Bill Compton and Eric Northman.
If that referance is lost on you, leave. now.

Either way, thank you for keeping the dream alive, creep that only plays at night

Hawks Can Talk?

So I'm in a certain class where public speaking is the main focus, so one would think a requirement of that class would be the full ability to speak English...apparently not.

We had our first speech today and everything was going fine: some people made me laugh, some made me feel bad about myself, and some just made me feel h'awkward, like this one Asian girl.

She was called up to make her speech, but was apparently confused by the assignment because she attempted to do a power point.  And then was thoroughly confused when the section leader wouldn't let her use a power point...for her speech...


Fast forward 5 minutes, and this Asian is in the middle of her speech,and no one has any idea what she is saying.  I am sure it was some form of English though because once in a while she would reference to pictures that I'm assuming would have been on her power point. At one point she tried to get creative and make her speech "interactive" it went a little like this...

Her: "Do anyone know?" "Anyone?" "No? Nobody know?"
2 guys in the front of class: "No! We don't know!'
Her: "IT MEEEE!"

Don't know what her speech was about but I really enjoyed class today.

Gingers.....

Ginger (noun) : a person who has or exhibits red(ish) hair, part of the Ginger Group see pale, weird, social outcast for additional information

For those of you who are uninformed about Gingers please read the above definition.

There is a phenomenon sweeping the Michigan State campus........GINGER POWER. I witnessed symbols of this movement with my very own eyes in one of my smaller classes. Stretchy, rubber bracelets with "ginger power" written on them are now in existence and being circulated. The time has come. WE MUST PUT AN END TO THIS!

picture coming soon

Sparty In Training

Today at Sparty's a group of newly hired workers came in to start their training hours. I was working behind the counter when the group came in. There is limited walking space behind the counter and adding 8 more people in addition to me and my co worker made things even more cramped.

In this group of course there has to be "that guy". "That guy" probably thought he was being slick when he complimented me on my sandwich making skills and use of the cash registar. So not only did I have to walk by "that guy" every time I needed to do something, he picked up on my name from my tag I was wearing. So men, when trying to pick up the ladies a) make sure she is single and b) do not compliment her using food as the basis of your pick up line.

Dude, Where's My Pants...

     We have noticed an odd situation spreading amongst some of our peers here at MSU: People going pantless in the dead of winter. Okay, okay, so they're wearing shorts- but shorts are NOT pants, there is a difference- about 2-3 FEET worth of difference. While the rest of us are bundled up in scarves, hats, and obnoxiously similar looking coats, you h'AWKWARDLY advertise your lack of judgement and stupidity...

     Dude, it's mid January and windchill is 12 degrees.  Really, what's your deal?  Do these pantless students come from some magical land where humans are bred to be cold-tolerant? Is it laundry day? Tryin' to show off those 'sexy legs'? Or are you just looking for people to call you a douch-bag?

So, Mr. Shorts & Tall Socks Combo, we feel you have earned your place on Hawkward MSU;  But do us a favor, and get some f*ucking pants already.  It's winter damnit!

Hawk Sighting at Erikson Sparty's

Dear girl waiting in line,
What was it that your boyfriend did to make you so upset? As you may or may not have noticed, while you were busy breaking up with your boyfriend (over the phone...in line at Sparty's...) myself, and a few others, were listening in.  And while I do not agree with the manner, time, or place in which you decided it was time to end the lovin', you kept me entertained and for that I say "thanks!"

Unfortunately, you got your plain bagel with cream cheese before I got mine so I never will find out for sure whether he understood "You can do whateva the f*ck you want."

Nonetheless, I wish you a splendid weekend filled with drunken h'awkwardness caused by too much rebound sex.


Sincerely,
 girl who heard too much